Where did all the bad days go?

I was asked "Do you have Aikido good days and bad days?" by one of my students a few months ago.

It was a good question. An interesting question. It was also a question that I had not thought about.

My immediate response was to think "Of course I do. Everyone does." but to answer without thought would have been unfair to the student and, as it happens, to myself.

"Do I have good days and bad days" in my Aikido. Good question.

My answer is that I do not. I have 'Good Days' and 'Better Days'. I may have days when my Aikido works better than it does on other days, but I wouldn't call those 'bad days'. I do remember having bad days in Aikido during my Aikido journey, but none recently. I don't know when the bad days stopped but I haven't had one for several years now.

Now the more interesting question is "Where did all the bad days go?"

There are a couple of ways of looking at it:

1. I don't have bad days because I never push myself beyond my abilities.

Okay...this is a throw away. I don't believe it. I know that I push myself past what my abilities are. I still get frustrated when things don't work. I still look in awe at some of my teachers and hope to one day be able to do all that they do. There have been many times when I have been training or teaching and not been able to do something. It does not make it a bad day.

2. My Aikido is more consistant now, so the days when I "can't get anything right" are in my past.

There may be something to this. I had never thought of my Aikido as "consistant" before this conversation and my student suggested that this is why the bad days have disappeared. I have always thought of of my Aikido as "needing improvement" and "getting there but still sometimes sloppy".

It may be that by achieving some consistant level of skill that the 'bad day' syndrome has disappeared.

3. Patience and the recognition that the study of Aikido is a long, long journey

I like this thought the most. I don't think that you can have a bad day if you accept the fact that things may take a really long time. It frees you up to enjoy the moment if you are not constantly in a rush to get through and gain from it.

You can be frustrated at not being able to do something but confident that you will be able to on some indeterminate 'someday' in the future.

Perhaps the training I have done over the last several years has shown me that I can improve and that I will get better. Things that I did not understand before I understand now. I believe that things I do not understand now will be understood later. I also think that things that are currently beyond my ability to see or feel will fall into my perception as my understanding of Aikido increases.

Since I know this I can still enjoy all of my training, even those days that I might have thought of as "bad" in the past.

Now every training day is a good day and every day I figure something out is a better day.